"Less martyrdom.
More mischief."
For 35 years in education, pastoral leadership and parenthood, I wore the mask of having everything under control — until burnout forced an honest reckoning.
“Looking after yourself isn’t selfish. It allows you to show up more calmly, honestly and fully for the people who matter.”
— Shiona Head
The Story Behind The Pattern Breaker
As a pastoral leader in schools, I often found myself wishing I could spend more time helping the parents. I could see that when the adults supporting a child were struggling, overwhelmed, or running on empty, the whole family felt the impact.
I also knew those pressures intimately from my own life. While raising two children and building a career in education and sports leadership, I juggled unrelenting responsibilities. On the surface, I appeared capable, reliable, and composed.
Beneath the surface, I was utterly exhausted. I was easily triggered, quick to temper, overwhelmed by emotion, and operating on empty reserves. I was giving so much that I stopped noticing what I needed, constantly questioning whether I was doing enough or if I was good enough in any role.
Eventually, acute burnout forced me to step away from work. It was a terrifying pause, but it demanded an honest look at how unsustainable my life had become.
The Breakthrough & Neurological Realisation
Through targeted coaching, neuroscience-led Havening, and belief reframing, I learned to recognize old perspectives that had silently governed me since youth. I stopped treating emotional reactions as personal character flaws and realised they were electrochemically encoded memories crying out for resolution.